Isolation doesn’t always turn you into a mental patient…

1 Oct

Brad get’s really angry at me alot because I don’t leave the house.  He get’s creeped out by how comfortable I am within my walls, and is convinced that someday I will crack wide open like a rotted egg- assualting everyone around me with the reek of my sulfer-infested mental decline.  To that, I say “Whatever, fella” and proudly stick my almighty middle finger in his eye (I’ve never actually hit his eye… not yet at least… he’s a spry fella for his age).

The big difference between me and Brad is that I can entertain myself quite nicely, and that is something that he isn’t really able to do.  He gets bored easily and needs constantly changing external stimulation (which isn’t a bad thing at all- it’s just the way alot of people are), but I’m satisfied with creating my own stimulation.  I love being around people (or, at least being around people of my choosing…. I hate being surrounded by morons, which is usually the case when stepping into the “outside world”), but I don’t NEED to be around people.  Brad doesn’t understand that.  He says I give him the willies.  We actually fight about this… which I think is insane.  I don’t get upset with his inability to stay put- he shouldn’t get mad at me for my comfort in staying put.  They’re just differences.  No big deal, right?  Someone please tell him it’s no big deal.  PLEASE!!!

But it’s because I’m able to stay put and fill my own time, I’m able to play around with funny ideas of things to make…. and my latest play-time resulted in much giggling.  I made more Severed Finger Cupcakes (because the other ones sold out in a couple days, and I was getting emails from people yelling at me to make more), but I added a little something new to the recipe….. dentures.  Here they are!!

Yes…. real dentures.  But they’re clean… don’t worry.  Funny, right?  I think so.  We’ll see how much people are into them.

On a completely different topic, my son has started getting into sculpture.  My art book library mainly consists of printmakers, painters, and illustrators… so he’s had to use what he sees in there to feed his creativity in a 3-D form.  Yesterday he was reading all my Dali books while working with clay, and he was trying his hand at little abstract sculptures taken from the flowing shapes in Dali’s paintings.  He brings one of them into my office, and says “I made this one for you”….. and it took everything I had to not fall out of my chair laughing, and to calmly say “Wow, Sully!  That’s really beautiful!!”.  It wasn’t bad… not at all!  The thing that killed me is that it looks like a sex toy.  Seriously.  I think I saw things exactly like this the last time I was in France.  Let me share with the group:

Maybe I’m a total jerk, but as soon as I saw it I thought “Hell, if he keeps this up, he could make a million working for vivid!”.  It’s sitting on my desk right now, because he made it for me, and his feelings would be hurt if it wasn’t on my desk.  But I’ve gotta say that I’m totally creeped out by this dildo looking thing made for me by my 10 year old son.

That is all I’ve got to tell for now.

I hope all you bunnies are having happy days!


9 Responses to “Isolation doesn’t always turn you into a mental patient…”

  1. Vikki October 1, 2008 at 2:23 pm #

    Ahhh.. I am in love with the denture cupcakes. Since I have no money I have even sent the link to my mother with a small hint at a perfect christmas present for me 😀

    You’re not alone with enjoying your own company (well.. I guess in a sense you are.. har har) I’m an only child, therefore I can find endless ways to amuse myself without other people or the outside world. Often I even prefer it.. especially as you say when it concerns the morons of the outside world.


  2. whitney October 1, 2008 at 6:13 pm #

    hooooooooooo crap those cupcakes are amazing!

    and yeah, brad’s crazy. i’m a total hermit too and i love it. shit’s gotta be really important for me to leave. #1- it’s gotta involve food, and i’m there…. #2- no shitty people. that’s really all it takes.

    hahahahahaha, i literally died laughing after looking at that picture of the sculpture after you described it!
    this is my fav: “But I’ve gotta say that I’m totally creeped out by this dildo looking thing made for me by my 10 year old son”
    haaaaaaahahahhah! i’ve got teeeeeaaaarrrrs!

  3. daMama October 1, 2008 at 6:56 pm #

    Dear Brad,
    Its okay, honestly. Lots of folks are really so very comfortable with their own company and either don’t need or don’t want all that outside stimulation. Sort of stifles the creativity, you know. Have you checked out the wacky cool stuff Kristen comes up with? No, I mean really checked it out. There is a really intelligent, creative and curious mind that probably does not need all kinds of outside stimulation.

    Kristen, checking out that cupcake and thought to myself ‘oh wow, that is so beautiful’, then I saw the teeth. AWESOME!

  4. dollypop just plopped October 1, 2008 at 7:07 pm #

    holy fuck ! a cupcake that could eat itself !
    so i didn’t get a fingercaken but holy my freaking gawd if i get a denturecaken i am sooooooooo making it into a hat that i will wear cocked just so.

    speaking of um, cock, i’m so sorry but that sculpture is great !
    no really it is !
    i do have to say that sue jo would have probably given 4 briquettes !

  5. Kristen Ferrell October 1, 2008 at 7:20 pm #

    daMama- ha ha ha ha ha!!! The teeth kindof sneak up on ya if you’re not expecting them, don’t they!! And thank you so much for the kind little note to Brad. I would be surprised to find out if he actually ever read anything I wrote on here. I could be spilling his darkest and ugliest secrets to the world, and he’d never know. He’s so busy trying to keep himself busy that he doesn’t notice the most blatant and obvious things that are right in front of his face. Silly boys.

    Thank you, lovely ladies, for supporting me in my hermitism. I’m not sure why Brad gets so upset that I’m home “too much”. If I went out all the time he’d totally freak out because then HE’D have to stay home with Sully and not go roam the streets doing whatever every night! I give him complete and total freedom to come and go as he wishes, and I have never ONCE asked him where he was. And I’m happy to stay home with Sully and my paintings and Star Trek DVD’s and icky little cupcakes. Some people can’t just be satisfied and thankful for what they have. Geeeezzzzzz!

    and lovely dollypop… I will make a million photo t-shirts at Wal-Mart of you wearing that cupcake as a hat. Seriously… that would be amazing!!!!

    and I’m still creeped out by Sully’s sculpture. I don’t think that’s going to change.

  6. myshinyhell October 2, 2008 at 3:59 am #

    I am exactly like you about facing the outside world and David is exactly like Brad. He can’t sit still or stay home for even one day and has to “DO something” or he goes stir-crazy. I never leave the house unless forced, and have tried to explain it to him with: “It’s just that every time I leave the house, I have to face the worst things humanity has to offer, starting with driving behavior… it depresses and frustrates me,” and he responds by either looking at me blankly or rolling his eyes sarcastically. It is hard being an introvert married to an extrovert sometimes. I am really shy and anxious in social situations where I don’t know anyone, yet am expected to make small talk, but David will have the entire room wrapped around his finger in one minute. If he hadn’t pursued me via email during our courtship, we probably wouldn’t be together!

    I like the way you put it: “I don’t NEED to be around other people.” Exactly. It’s nice once in awhile, but I don’t need it. What I do NEED is time to myself- something I get so much less of now that I’m a momma, and I think that has been my biggest parenthood adjustment.

    Did you like to play by yourself, use your imagination, as a kid? I always preferred this and wonder sometimes if I’m just this way because I always have been. My little sister always had to play with someone, I wanted to be alone. She followed me around and drove me nuts. I was always so relieved when she had a friend over to play with. I think this is also why I’m so much more a cat person than dog person. Heh.

    Your dentures cupcake makes me smile and smile. And so does Sully’s scultpture. That… is… awesome. 🙂


  7. Cassie October 2, 2008 at 7:00 am #

    I am a mixture of both an introvert and an extrovert. I like to be social and around people, I just cant do it ALL the time.
    Brad, let Kristen be!

    As I said before I love love love the denture cupcakes! And Sully’s scultpture is great! I worked for Pricilla’s for a long time and it would fit right in. Not that that makes you feel any better about it.

  8. christine October 2, 2008 at 7:05 am #

    LOOVE the cupcakes. Now i know what to do with all those dentures no one uses at work!!

    I barely have my ‘quiet time’ so the nights where i’m not at work and not out, I can definately appreciate staying in for hours and work on little projects and all sorts of things and be the crazy hermit recluse that lives upstairs of ‘the scary house’. I swear people must see me walking back and forth, jumping around and think i’m half nuts. I love it!

  9. Kristen Ferrell October 3, 2008 at 10:38 am #

    Holy crap!!! Christine, I will totally trade you stuff or whatever for any dentures that you have lying around!! THAT WOULD RULE!!! Because sometimes good dentures are really hard to find. 😀

    I’m a really social person. I like being around other people alot, but I got all that youthful crazy “I must be FREEEEEEE!!” crap outta my system at a young age, and when I got pregnant with Sully at 21 I was totally ok with dedicating the next 18 years to hanging out at the house with him. It really isn’t a big deal, and I certainly don’t think that it makes me a weirdo.

    But, tawni… you did TOTALLY nail it with this statement:
    “It’s just that every time I leave the house, I have to face the worst things humanity has to offer, starting with driving behavior… it depresses and frustrates me,”
    The only time Sully will ever hear me totally go off and scream obscenities is while I’m driving. I have little patience for ignorance- and sharing the road with other drivers is nothing but moron-bombardment.

    I think I played by myself alot when I was little because I had 2 brothers. And once my little brother was old enough to refuse my demands of playing tea party or dolls with me, it was pretty much just me and my own company. That’s probably why I like cats, too. They independent and low-maintenance.

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