Pulling out my soapbox and dusting it off…

29 Jul

A month ago when Sully went back to Kansas with his dad to visit for the summer, I thought I’d have SO much more free time to get all kinds of things done.  I’ll write more, paint more, draw more, clean my house more, garden more, etc etc etc.  None of that has happened yet.  I’m not sure how this human construct called “Time” can get so quickly filled with things that previously didn’t exist, or how it seems to slip away quicker and quicker each day… but it’s oh-so-very rude, and I resent it deeply.

Here’s another thing that I’m getting to resent deeply, but is causing me great internal conflict-  rich white knee-jerk liberals and how seriously they take themselves.  Now, if I was to categorize myself, I could neatly be tucked into the “Liberal” slot on the pegboard.  If you go down the “Liberal” list of do’s and don’t- it pretty much sums me up (except for the death penalty… which I think should really only be for the rapists and child molesters.  And I’d happily gun down every guilty one of them out there and still sleep like a baby at night.)  But to make broad and sweeping generalizations, you can toss me in with the liberals.

Because I’m grouped into this category, it makes me hang my head in embarrassment every time I see them with their pursed self-righteous lips and tightly crossed arms over mundane and even humorous things.  The liberals have gotten even more uptight than the conservatives- but on the “Politically Correct” side of the coin.  “Political Correctness” was brought to the social table to keep people from being a target, as well as to keep offensive behavior at bay (or at least in a public setting).  Not a bad idea.  But of course, as with everything, people have taken it too far.  And now it’s obnoxious, petty, and irritating.  And it’s the equivalent of the crazy fundamental Christians who believe the earth is only 6,000 years old speaking for the entire Christian community.  Unfortunately, the fundamental Liberals are becoming more and more prevalent.

For example- I was watching the news today at work.  I watch the CNN channel HLN (Headline news) because it’s got an even mix of real news and silly puff pieces.  I like that… just when the horrors of today’s society start to get to me with stories of rape and abduction and suicide bombers and murder, they throw in a bunch of stories about kittens or monkeys.  It makes the horror go down a little easier.  But today their “Word on the Street” segment was about the site www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com.   Basically, all the site consists of is photo after photo of cats who’s markings make them look like Hitler.  My Oscar cat has a Kitler moustache.  See for yourself:

He looks like he's snarling, but he really was just about to sneeze.

This site is hilarious.  And what better way to degrade one of the most horrific men in modern history than to dedicate a site to kittens that cop his style, making a complete mockery of the man.  But what was the “Word on the Street” in upper-class white suburban Liberal America?  Horror.  People were “horrified”.  Their word- not mine.  One man was so appalled by these photos of kittens with little moustaches that he marched away from the camera man yelling.  Really?!?! THIS is what appalls our enlightened community?  THIS is what makes them angry?  Kittens.  Who look like Hitler.  On a website.  Ya wanna know what makes THIS Liberal angry? How about the fact that a woman born in South Africa has a greater chance of being raped than learning to read.  Or maybe the fact that we’re still spending billions on a war that we’ll never win while our economy has been leveled and our unemployment rate is through the roof and public schools are closing left and right.  Or maybe the fact that we never really did do much of anything to help the Hurricane Katrina victims and it’s still a mess down there YEARS after the storm passed.  Hell- pick a topic… any topic… and talk about how we’re globally failing at it.  But don’t you DARE post a photo of a kitten that has a Hitler Moustache.  Ever.  THAT’S just wrong!!!!

Fucking idiots.

This is just one example that really got to me today.  But it’s everywhere.  Sheltered white Americans desperate for a cause, and misguided about what that cause should be since they’re so achingly out of touch with what is truly degrading, insulting, and damaging.  The other day, I posted on my Facebook page that I was disturbed by the fact that “Jack in the Box” now accepts foodstamps- and my opinion was called “dictatorial”.  To flippantly throw the possibility of not being able to use foodstamps to buy french fries and milkshakes in the same dictator category as Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, Saddam Hussein, and others of the like, degrades the horrors of what dictatorships have done to cultures.

I think it’s the pettiness of it that really gets to me.  The pettiness coupled with how very well off we all are… and the misdirected “horror”.  With all the monstrous acts that occur every single  minute of every single day- these silly and completely forgettable things are what that get the open-minded bohemian Liberals upset.  I was in Whole Foods today (a grocery store that I have grown to loathe and I swore to Brad that after today I cannot bring myself to enter one again), and the place was filled with rich white housewives complaining about how the price of organic produce has gone up while ignoring their exquisitely dressed spoiled children tearing through the store behaving like vile rabid monkeys. How out of touch are we in our little American bubble?  If you’re reading this right now, as far as global perspective goes,you’re well-off.  It means you have a roof over your head and a computer with an internet connection… or even an insanely priced cell phone that allows you access to the internet.  How many of you bought coffee at a coffee shop today?  Do you have a TV?  How about an ipod?  Dvd player?  How many of you were able to sleep soundly last night without the fear of gunfire shooting through your walls or having someone come in and assult/kill you or your loved ones?  Will you drink clean water today?  Take a shower without fear of being infected with parasites?  Did you go hungry today?  Did you sell your body on the street to buy your kid food?  Do you have access to medial treatment if you need it?  Are you able to pay most of your bills on time?  It’s all about perspective, and keeping our causes in check.  When Kathleen Hanna now devotes her political efforts to Peta commercials talking about saving the bunnies while infant rape is commonplace in South Africa- we Liberals need to wake the fuck up and realize that we have now become a joke. I’m just as guilty as lapsing into delusion as the next person- but I try to wake myself up as often as I can and realize that just because I can’t pay all my bills every month and things are sometimes a little tough- as far as “The Big Picture” goes, my little family unit is just fine and there are MUCH bigger problems to get upset about.

So to all my fellow ashamed Liberals out there… spread the word for everyone to lighten up.  Because if the biggest horror of your day is a website with photos of kittens with moustaches, you are extremely lucky- and embarrassingly misguided to see that as a “horror”.


17 Responses to “Pulling out my soapbox and dusting it off…”

  1. BFA July 29, 2010 at 8:03 pm #


    One thing I’ve always said, “A person’s ability to be offended is directly linked to their lack of a sense of humor.” I believe people see the potential to be offended (even though they aren’t really)and jump at the chance to preach and correct people. It’s almost like one-upping someone else or like the person who always takes the contrary point of view to sound smarter than you. Fuck those people.

    People need humor to heal. And if we can laugh at Hitler, then we’re slightly better off then when people had to fear him.


    • Kristen Ferrell July 29, 2010 at 11:49 pm #

      I think humor takes the power out of bad things. If you can laugh at something, it can’t hurt you as badly. It’s not disrespectful- it’s coping. And it’s why I laugh myself to tears at movies like “Happiness”.
      And I can’t even imagine going through life getting offended by EVERY LITTLE THING. It just seems like such a drag.

      You’re 100% right on. As always.

      • TaraRist July 30, 2010 at 8:55 am #

        Absolutely! Within hours of my rape (I wasn’t injured too badly) I couldn’t help but start making jokes. I mean when you’re waiting in a hospital for 6 hours, it’s difficult to distract your mind from what happened to you in any other way. They seemed inappropriate to those who didn’t know me, but my family and my best friend knew that it’s just who I am. It was a coping mechanism, it was taking away that freaks’ power over me.
        Just like with this ridiculous outcry over the Cat website, poking fun at a pretty serious occurrence doesn’t make what happened less appalling, it’s turning it around and causing smiles, how can you argue with that?!
        I have counselors who have recommended that I remember my rape as a cartoon, or to change details in a silly or funny way. It’s how humans cope.
        People need to continue recognizing the disgusting parts of life, but we NEED the funny parts as well.

        • Gretchen July 30, 2010 at 10:29 am #

          Good point Kristen… Some days I get bent outta shape about silly stuff, like forgetting my phone at home or dumb sh*t like that – and then have to think… “If this is really the worst thing that happened today, I’m doing damn good!”

          In response to Tara’s comment:
          Yeah, I guess I did the same thing! Which is also how me and my family cope with hard stuff. With dry humor!

          Your comment made me recall when I went to the hospital to have a rape kit done. A nurse or social worker asked me a bunch of questions and one was “What is your religion?” I thought it was kinda silly, so I responded (with a dead serious face), “I worship Satan.” She was shocked and the I laughed maniacally and told her I was just kidding!
          She left me alone immediately. I know she was only trying to helpful in some way or another.

          Sometimes others don’t get it and may think you’re being an insensitive jerk.

          Awww well! 🙂 Take care ladies!

          • Kristen Ferrell July 30, 2010 at 3:28 pm #

            What amazes me is that out of the first few comments posted on here, 2 were from women who had been raped. Which proves my point exactly- the masses are appalled by fundamentally ridiculous things while rape is common enough in this country that with less than 10 comments left on here, there are enough people who have gone through it to share coping stories. Why is our culture not fighting the battles that need to be fought, but getting bent out of shape over nothingness!

            But ladies, my heart breaks for you both- but swells for your strength. I don’t do well with “bad feelings”- so I make everything a joke. My permanent giggling emotional barricade. And it works. Because if I actually sat and let all the shit sink in fully, I don’t know if I would be able to stop crying.

  2. Julie July 30, 2010 at 8:38 am #

    Dear Kristen,
    Thank You for saying that.

  3. hayley g July 30, 2010 at 8:44 am #

    you are amazing 🙂

  4. whitney July 30, 2010 at 11:55 am #

    i’ve missed this. a lot. ❤

    • Kristen Ferrell July 30, 2010 at 4:01 pm #

      I’ve neglected my little rantings. I need to not do that, because I feel so much better after I’ve purged (and god knows Brad is sick of hearing me bitch). I’ll write more. I promise. xoxoox

  5. Tawni July 31, 2010 at 9:20 am #

    Dearest Kristen,

    I could not possibly love you, your brain, or your perfect sense of perspective any more than I do. You are just too awesome. MWAH! xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoooo.



    • Kristen Ferrell July 31, 2010 at 1:03 pm #

      Oh Tawni…. I adore you too! I think that if everyone just had a little more “big picture” perspective, there would be a lot more social harmony. The nit-picking and fury over petty dalliances does nothing but distract from uniting and conquering major catastrophes that are traumatizing millions. It makes about as much sense as trying to reorganize your sock drawer after your entire house has just been leveled by a tornado. But people get hyper-focused on all those petty details, and intellectually don’t go any further than those petty details- then nothing gets done, and we get further from each other socially. When the governor of New Jersey is holding press conferences on how he doesn’t approve of Snooki, and people are actually DEBATING on this topic for days in the news- then I think our priorities are all a little out of wack.

      Biggest hearts to you, lovely lady.

  6. Lucy August 1, 2010 at 1:08 pm #

    I LOVE YOU!!!! You put things SOOO well. I hope that lots and lots and lots of people read this xxx

    • Kristen Ferrell August 1, 2010 at 1:48 pm #

      Thank you, dollface Lucy!! It’s one thing to get annoyed or bitch about the petty irritants in life- but to get truly angry over them degrades the massive life traumas that are going on everywhere, all the time.
      I just would like for people to wake up a little bit. Will that actually happen? Probably not. But at least we can try to stay grounded, right?

  7. LRA September 26, 2010 at 3:54 pm #

    Here’s some more Kitler humor for you!



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